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Hello, I am R.M. I'm in my 30s. About the only thing I've accomplished in my life so far is surviving. At first it doesn't sound like much, but I have to rethink that position. When I consider that I was born with fetal alcohol syndrome, cerebral palsy and a host of other challenges, surviving is pretty darn good. When I consider that 16 of my 18 years growing up were spent surviving physical, mental and sexual abuses, one could consider surviving an accomplishment. To be honest, one of the reasons that I got interested in tools for life was because I was not brought up very well at all. I do not have the emotional mental or physical tools to create the skill sets I need for success. My physical and mental disabilities does not make succeeding in life impossible, but it's not a stretch to say that it's a lot more challenging. One of the reasons that I'm writing this note is because I am putting a decision into words: I choose to live. As God gives me grace, I choose to thrive, not just survive. I just had to put it into words.
RM
I have been through some pretty dark times, and some similar situations. I am so glad you are on this site and fighting for your survival, and your growth!
Your parents may have messed up as parents...That is their burden, and I hope one day you will be able to forgive them. That is part of setting yourself free from what they did or did not do as parents.
Hang in there. Call friends or blog when you need help. And if the suicidal thoughts ever get too loud, call your physician immediately! Tell them how you are feeling, and ask for help! I have so been there too!
Many communities will be participating in the "Out of the Darkness" walks promoted by the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention. For more information please check out www.outofthedarkness.org
honestly, i feel that if i didnt take inititives to quit alcohol and substance abuse, i would be ready to give up. I'm married and my love for my wife is the only reason i've hung on.
Now that i've found tools to life, (after a week approx) I have set some goals, and have a path to follow, with support through this site.
been sober for going on 5 days now, and my outlook is positive.